Get Out of Your Own Way

There is something to be said for trusting yourself. With my anxiety, I struggle with this. The problem is that I can't always tell when my instincts are screaming, "NO!" or my anxiety is getting the best of me. I have started creating personal goals for myself. I want to challenge my anxiety while holding on to my instincts. It has been a pretty bizarre process but I'm liking it. I push myself to step out of my comfort zone and see that the world is not going to come to an end. As long as I stop standing in my own way, I have a great time.
I realized how important this was for me when I spent weeks debating if I was capable of going to Florida for a week with my friends. Normally, this isn't a hard choice. I thought it was a hard decision because of my anxiety. I tried so hard to get myself to say, "yes". Yet, no matter what I did, I couldn't make that choice and I ended up turning down the trip.
As it turns out, it was not my anxiety preventing me but my instincts. One week before the trip, my (former) boyfriend left. I realized later that it wasn't because I was anxious about traveling. Although, I usually get anxious about going places. I couldn't say, "yes" because a deeper part of me knew the trip wasn't going to work out so well. If I would have ignored that little voice, the trip could have been a total mess.
So how exactly am I challenging my anxiety? I'm not big into parties. I like a small group setting much more. Yet, I've been taking every chance I get to go out with my friends. I've been to several bars and a couple parties. As long as I'm surrounded with great people, I have a good time. I am also hanging out with my roommates more. It's my goal to create a bond with each one of the girls I live with. I have been making so many more friends and I am finding that I am getting happier. While the wild life will never be my first choice, I'm learning to enjoy myself in all types of situations.